Review: HIDE AND CREEP

 

  

This section is where I trawl the depths of various popular streaming sites and scour the bargain bins of supermarkets and pound shops to find the unknown or unloved independent zombie movies and discover if they are as frustrating as pulling teeth or as satisfying as breaking off fingers. Our first victim is ....

HIDE AND CREEP (2004) USA 1hr 25mins

Directors:- Chuck Hartsell and Chance Shirley

Residents in Thorsby, Alabama find themselves in the midst of a zombie apocalypse as the dead begin digging themselves up from the surrounding graveyards. If that wasn't enough there is also talk of alien abduction as Mike (Michael Shelton) awakes a top a tree, naked from the waist down, wondering where his car and girlfriend have gone, why his butt hurts so much and is perplexed as to the abundance of the undead. Video store owner Chuck (Chuck Hartsell), Rev Smith (Barry Austin), gun club owner and mullet toteing redneck Keith (Kyle Holman) plus a whole host of other townsfolk find themselves unprepared but are determined to fight for their lives. Thorsby is going to shit quick and the worst thing for some of the residents is the fact that the football game on the TV is interrupted by pesky news reports.

This obvious micro budget comedy is a wonderful tribute to some classic zombie movies. I found this in the dark depths of Amazon Prime where they say it was released in 2007, IMDb says it is 2004, either way it looks incredibly dated with dodgy late 90's/early 2000's costumes, old boxy TV sets and split folding mobile phones. The zombies are the slow shuffling type with very basic make up but bring a great sense of humour and, thankfully, there are a lot of them. The opening scenes are an unsubtle but endearing tribute to Dawn of The Dead, The Evil Dead and Brain Dead as Chuck is on the phone to a customer trying to justify why he is totally out of US zombie movies saying "I hate to tell you there is only like 3 good American zombie movies and Romero made those." Chucks first encounter with a ghoul at his store involves him taking out the undead by striking him over the head with a VHS player that then spits out a video tape copy of Night of the Living Dead. The majority of the zombies are all dressed in natty 60's style suits and there are more than a few dressed up like Johnny from the previously mentioned Romero classic, I believe that one of the female characters is also named Barbara which may or may not be a coincidence. The acting is really awful, the camera work is dodgy and the storyline really is all over the place but despite all of this everyone involved looked like they were having a great time and it is a hell of a lot of fun!! I mean with some hilarious dialogue like "I don't care if they're the damn Swedish bikini team. I'm about to introduce these bastards to a world of hurt!" and the great tannoy announcement "I'd like to remind customers that since we're in the midst of an unholy siege Downtown stores is still open for business." It is hard to not emit a little titter. The make up might be simple and cheap looking but it has plenty of blood, some good gut munching (which made me more than a little hungry) and some effective head shot effects. The score was composed by Eric McGinty who created a humourous collection of back country banjo enthused incidentals that really went well with the rest of the movie as well as that he also played the character of Ned. There is nudity in this but for this kind of movie I would say that it's fairly sparse and it's not just the ladies that let it all hang out so in that respect it's pretty equal. 

In conclusion I would say if you haven't seen HIDE AND CREEP then do so. Pour yourself a pint of Trioxin, break off a few fingers from your last victim for a tasty snack and just sit back and enjoy!